Have you ever wondered what makes a person start a blog?  I have not.  It seems pretty simple.  Blogs are started to talk about something.

The fury I find comes in the minds of those who write of themselves.  It is almost as if Facebook does not have enough room for all of these folks’ faery tale wishes and wants, complaints and flaunts.  If i were to think like these people, i might believe that these blogs were all created just to come find me after i deactivated my Facebook account during the last election cycle.  That would be ridiculous, though.

I have read blogs about music, about art, about science, symmetry, and chaos, all of them beneficial in that I walked my little fingers away from them knowing more about the world.  Blogs written by autobiographers about every stupid little thing they do, though, these 21st Century Narcissuses who all seem to be on quests to validate a uselessness to the greater good, should find something else to do for the world. More on that later.

No normal, goal oriented human being wants to hear someone talk about how everything around them holds them back.  No rational, motivated champion for a cause wants to hear about running away to greener grasses.  If you want to use your blog for something bigger than yourself, do what real heroes from history did.  They all made their surroundings better.  They all identified a problem and worked towards that problem, not towards themselves.  For example, Abraham Lincoln told the slave owners to shove it.  He paid with his life, but he did it.  If he had just sat around sipping tea and picking that knotty log of a nose hoping and dreaming, who knows where we would be right now.  Slippery, maybe?

If you feel a need to start a social selfie splatter board, I’d ask you do three things first:

1.  Close your dreamy eyes and put on the biggest hopeful smile you can conjure because life is about to go over all mystical and glittery.  You are going to get yourself some winged cotton candy pillow swirls of chocolate and sweet sweet unicorn pee.

2.  Use your apparent superhuman echolocation abilities to find your way through the griminess that makes your life such the shiny icon of interestingness which warrants yet another look at me blog. (after all, you shouldn’t have to see the filth.  You should be able to spout off at the keyboard, to stand outside and throw rocks from behind the bushes, and then drift away into night, your passive aggressive paradise of non-confrontational anonymity, right?)  After all, life should be like dessert–like forever dessert!

3.  Walk right out into traffic.  Don’t look, dammit!  You are special and should be able to navigate the world around you without having to bother yourself with the laborious process of opening your eyes and getting to know it.

CRASH!   (Sweet Jesus!  Darwin was right after all!)

The zen i find comes in the form of knowing that it is far better to be a judgmental asshole than a self-absorbed prick.

Love ya bunches!

 

My Best,

Moe Damn Fury